Marked for Mayhem

(I adamantly apologize for all the awkwardly annoying alliterations. Forgive this forlorn fool...)


I've been the misbehaved, mischievous misfit straight from the start. With two prim and proper siblings it's hard not to stand out. (In a negative nuance naturally.) It's not that I have a grueling grudge against anal authority or frequently following rules, considerably the contrary. However I disdainfully dislike idolizing idiotic idiosyncrasies grounded in ignorance or insanity.

Let's find the common connection combining my current conundrum and my tenacious tendency to toss the trivial tenets. Since someone seldom can stand relying on ridiculous rules she ran to rebellion. It was all about absolute ascendancy, commonly called control. The seduction of superiority snuck in and sunk in. Personally I wanted to procure power over person by baiting body over the basic building blocks. This is where we went wrong, Ed and I, to explicitly elaborate. Down and down and down the duet deathly drowns. Let there be light? Fight or flight? Do or die: decide!

Fortunately for friends and family fate has found me and is forcing me to feel. Glee to grief, play to pain, excitement to exhaustion: they're all there. No numbing; zero zoning.

I may be marked for mayhem but I'm making up my mind. Realizing recovery. Discovering a newly directed determination. Fighting not flying. Starting to stand soundly; picking my permanent place. One ounce at once. Measure, not maliciously, meticulously manipulate. Focus on the future; pass the past - leave it lonely.

Marked for mayhem yet punishing my pride. Ready to revisit recovery.